First, I went to the Brooklyn Artists Gym where I spoke to some artists and looked at my work; it was not well lit and I had Peter put a spotlight on it - painting that’s not well lit won’t present itself as well.  I insist on good lighting - and hopefully, good placement.

But I also felt sad tonight - and I had to express it - so I painted another Oil Pastel Sketch.  It’s hard to explain - and it’s what led me to paint again.

 

A couple of thoughts - all my fellow artists - and other artists, in their own studios, had their work on display tonight and Sunday - and probably longer after that.  My work, each done in one sitting - using Acrylic - looks raw.  I mean….I’m wondering when I’ll be ready, or willing to commit more than one sitting to any one painting - as there’s only so far an artist can go in one sitting.   In my case, the oil pastel sketch was done in a little over an hour.   I’m so aware of my limitations - my impatience, the problems I have with detail - of not even being sure I want to paint the details.

And then, I think about the people looking at my painting and I feel the burden … do they like my work?  Suddenly I’m glad I don’t make my living as an artist, that I don’t count on people liking and buying my work….how hard that would be.

While I was depressed by something else - the matter of who was looking at my work and what they thought, what I thought, depressed still more.

It’s as if, I got over my fear of showing my work - coming this far in the last 6 months - from not having painted in over 10 years before what forced me to begin again, this spring - only to realise I’m really at the beginning - all over again.

The only thing I’ve got - is the knowledge and good sence to know who I am - and what is me and what is not me.  My work no longer looks like anyone else’s - it comes out of me, for better or worse.

Another thought - it’s easy to like paintings that look closer to a visual representation (person, still life, landscape) - the closer a painting is to common visual language - the easier time viewers have relating to it.  On the other hand, the more common the visual language, the more easy it is to dismiss the work (because it approaches a photograph).  People tend to admire the skill of representation - but the best artists hid many abstract qualities within the visual representation (ie: a portrait) - no doubt - visual representation is also limiting.

In my painting, above, I’m struggling both with my sadness - which feels profound, and the medium itself. I simply do not want to focus on details - yet I feel I should.

Also ran into 2 new friends, Matthew and Nichelle at BAG, they were taking a tour of the galleries in the building.  The two middle photos are of LemurPlex, a new Robotics, Electronics training lab in Brooklyn, a couple of blocks from BAG.

  

 

The last photo on the right is at BAG, it’s sorta a party to go along with the art opening.

And finally, what are they studying at the LemurPlex?
Saturday and Sunday, October 21st and 22nd, 12:00PM-6:00PM

Physical Computing Intensive using MidiTron:

Intro to Electronics and Interfacing Sensors, Lights and Robotics

Have you ever wondered how to play music by moving your hands or trigger video clips with the blink of an eye? In one weekend, you will learn how to do this through tutorials in basic electronics, MAX/MSP/Jitter programming, sensor building, lights, robotics, and interactive design using the Miditron (a sensor and robotic interface device). You will learn these techniques hands-on by building mini-projects and ideas of your own design. This is of interest to Artists, Musicians, Dancers, Actors, Engineers, Programmers, Lighting, Sound and Graphic Designers, and others.

You will have the opportunity to design sensor-based projects using MidiTron. You will learn basic electronics, MIDI, and programming in order to implement your projects. You will learn how to incorporate basic circuits into your projects and art. Subjects covered will include electronic components, symbols and schematics, electricity flow, making connections, testing, and troubleshooting. Programming using MAX/MSP/Jitter will also be taught so that you can control sound and visuals through the computer. Through guided tutorials and critiques, we will explore technical and aesthetic issues regarding their projects. In addition, prior art will be discussed for inspiration and analysis. No previous knowledge of electronics, sensors, or programming is assumed.

Sounds really interesting …. I’m not sure it’s the couse I’d take now - yet there are ideas that I could execute better on a computer/electronics medium - like showing my life as a web page (ie: like the home page of a big corporation - but it’s all about me - did a sketch of that a couple of weeks ago - but I’m not sure how I’ll execute yet - all these ideas require more than one sitting and I’m not sure I’m ready for this yet - we’ll see).

Time to go to be, or try to.